Attempted Runner.

Race Recap: Nitro Turkey

Over the last few years, I joined the masses on Thanksgiving by doing a “Turkey Trot,” except my Turkey trot is a lot better than everybody elses because it is with Brazen Racing.
Since, it is now a tradition, it basically is the same every year. Same location, same time, same company and I wouldnt javent any other way. However this year was a little different only because I had a rough start.
My alarm went off at 4:45 and unfortunately, I slept through it. I eventually woke myself up at 5:30 and had to rush through my morning to get ready so I could leave by 6. Let me tell you…having to shave your legs (downside of wearing shorts all the time), make breakfast, using the restroom multiple times (it was NOT pretty….aaaahaha) is not my ideal way to kick off the morning. But somehow I managed and I left the house, roughly 20 minutes behind schedule but still had plenty time to not miss the start. I basically wanted to arrive early so I could park my car either at the park’s lot or the Sheriff’s station and not have to park a mile down the road (and walk or catch the shuttle).
So, I’m driving along thinking things would get better. My wrapped in foil, breakfast burrito was sitting on my center console just waiting to be eaten. I was going to wait til I got to the park, but my hunger decided otherwise. I begin to unwrap the foil. The smell infiltrates my car. My mouth waters. I take a bite and feel liquid on my chin….
I cooked my eggs fully. I used shredded cheese, not nacho cheese. I didn’t use that much hot sauce, so why the liquid?

I look my the review mirror….

Blood everywhere!!

I sadly wrapped my burrito back up, found a tissue and wiped my chin off. Stupid cold sore. I NEVER get cold sores. Ok…lie. I get them like once every four years. Apparently the week prior to Thanksgiving was my due date, and that morning it was in the healing up, but crusting over and cracked skin stage. I guess bitting into the burrito made my mouth open too wide and made my lip crack and bleed. I drove a little more, but my stomach rumbled. I picked up my burrito once again, took a bite and had to wrap it up and wipe my chin off again.
Just repeat that about three more times.

I didn’t learn the first few times but when I’m hungry…..I don’t think properly. Then I get mad because I still had like 20 miles to go before I can park my car and do this a little more easily, rather than trying to drive, eat and bleed to death.

Now, I was getting closer and pulled off the freeway. I only have about three miles to go and I’m Hangry (hungry and angry). I make a right…..and have to slow down at what I now call the Turkey crossing.


Why did the turkey cross the road? To avoid being eaten on Thanksgiving.

I sat there for a minute and watched them cross. Then as I see them reach the other sidewalk, I laugh hysterically. All my morning troubles went away and evertything was now Fungry!! (funny but still hungry). But within 3 minutes, I parked my car and had my no longer warm yet slightly blood stained burrito…..yep, still ate it.

I walked up to the starting area and met up with J who was volunteering. She finally listened to the doctor and volunteered rather than run on a defunked foot. That, and her doctor didn’t leave her much choice after putting a cast on it. I talked to her for a bit, got my bib/shirt and met up with Big D and I met his wife (EDee) and son (BeeDee). His son had high hopes of setting a PR from last year of like 1:11:00 or 1:16:00…he’s 4 and adorable. 

J was still busy at the merch table, so I went over to get my bag to get it prepared for sweat check and save time when I need to drop it off. That’s where I found The Chef and her family….her precious little daughter also thought I was her aunt. That’s how cool I am. Everyone wishes I was their aunt. Haha.

I then saw That Girl at chatted with her for a bit before Mr. Brazen called for the Streakers to help out. Living up to my title, I went over to assist by helping out during the kids race.


I talked with LouWho for a bit and then as the little Turkeys line up, I had the task of moving the delineator from one side of the track to the other to open the course wider for the return. Basically, a course monitor of sorts. Mrs. Brazen also told us that if we saw any little turkeys fall, to help them back up. So…course safety monitor too? Ha.

Once those little turkeys took off, it was pandemonium. They were so fast! And lots of them! They were coming back on the left before we could move the cones over to the right because kids were still going out to the turn around. It was hectic but as always, still went smoothly. One little guy fell and started crying, so I picked him up, brushed him off and asked if his mom was around.  All the sudden, this lady runs up, yells “COME ON, LETS GO!!!”  yanks him by the arm and drags him away, crying and all. I was kinda dumbstruck for a moment but thought that she was just really excited and didn’t want him to come in last place. Mother Runner problems??? :::shrugs::::

All the littles where looping back around, I took some pictures of the littles I knew, to send to their bigs later. That’s when I saw that mom, still dragging her kid to the finish line. Him still crying his eyes out. He’s probably traumatized and will never want to run again. Way to go, overly excited mom. Way to go.

Anyway, after the littles were done it was time to line up for the start of both the 5k and 10k. This is one of the only two (?) Brazen events that have the different race distances all start at once. It’s also one of the only one of the Brazen runs that does not offer a half marathon distance. It’s all understandable though, as it makes things go by quicker so people (participants, spectators, volunteers and most importantly Brazen Crew) can go spend time with their families sooner.

I went over to drop my bag off at sweat check (took my warm sweatpants/jacket off and stripped down to my tank and shorts…always the worse moment. It’s so cold!), and that’s when I realized how many people there where. Yikes. If I went to where I normally go in the corrals, I would be stuck…for a long period of time, before I can breath freely. So, I moved a LOT closer to the starting line. I’m never that close (except at the runs with like 50 people in my distance) and was a little worried that I would get in the way of the fast runners. That’s when I saw people all around me that I just knew would walk. You, know…the ones wearing jeans or with 2-3 year olds (without strollers) and people like PyschoC (I’m not being mean in naming her that…their seriously psychotic and someone who makes you want to run faster just to get away from them for your own safety), so I wasn’t to worried then. I’d be a least running and everyone else would slow them down. Hey…at least it wasn’t me slowing anyone down.
Sorry, lost my train of thought….so, Mrs. Brazen sounds the horn and I try desperately to get around the masses. It worked and although I was still surrounded by people for the first mile, I wasn’t elbow to elbow with them like previous years. Then, two of my fellow Brazenites/Streaker, ran by and they were carrying shopping bags from Macy’s, Nordstroms and a few other popular stores. They were talking loudly and saying things like…”I got the last Tickle Me Elmo.” “I love Shopping!!” I started cracking up. They were the Black Friday shoppers!!

I was still laughing when I got to the first mile marker and abruptly stopped laughing because I saw PhyschoC standing at the top of the hill, in people’s way, waiting for her walking friends. Logically, I moved to the left and avoided eye contact. It’s was like the Indiana Jones ride in Disneyland…you know, don’t gaze into the eyes if Mara, otherwise you’ll meet instant doom…then the doors open and your jeep goes faster, you get whiplash, arrows are shot at you and rats drop from the ceiling and a big boulder comes barreling down towards you……instant doom. But I digress…

I minded my own buisness, passed PsychoC and started running again. That hill slowed down a lot of people so I was finally able to reach my spot in the crowd where there is only 2-3 people around you at any given time, if even that many…unless your passing or being passed.

I grabbed some Ultima at the add station and carried on. I did 3/1s but started slowing down towards the third mile, to where I wanted to stop and walk, but I willed myself to maintain 3/1s. Or at least 3/1.5s.
Alas, I made it to the clearing. My iPod was still going (it’s doesn’t hold a charge anymore). It was no longer overcast and cold. The sun was out and I was hot. I’m not sure what the temp was, but I was in fire. Haha. I made it to the pavement and again, wanted to quit. How could I though when I only had like 0.1 miles to go? I trudged on and crossed the finish line. I think I hit 45 minutes or something. I didn’t really pay much attention. I just figured that I’ve been slacking so hard lately, (that reads as not doing anything active for almost two months) that just finishing was enough for me.
I picked up my medal (part of it…wait for my next installment of the Quarry Turkey recap ) and went straight for my sweatpants.
I met back with J, talked a little with my all my buddies….BeeDee did hit a PR by like 5 minutes, and grabbed some chips. I ended up leaving earlier than I normally would have, not because of Thanksgiving, but because I was getting hungry again and didn’t want to fill up on the snacks Brazen supplies. They have good snacks like, gummy bears, paydays, its-it ice creams, pumpkin pie, salty, sweet, chewy, delicious, calorie galore goodies!

Oh…and fruit.

I made it home, took a shower had a healthier lunch, and made the best decision of my life. Wear sweatpants to my Aunts for Thanksgiving!!
Normally, everyone’s dressed up a little nicer but I said screw it. By the time dinner was over, I knew people were uncomfortable in their dressy closes. Yep, I was comfortable as all hell in my sweats and the best part, I was able to come straight home and jump into bed. Instant pajamas!!

Don’t be surprised if at Christmas, I show up in my sweatpants with my own pillow and blanket.


1 Comment so far
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Nice job!! Sweatpants would be my preferred pants of choice every day if I wouldn’t get looks at work 😉 I feel so bad for that kid whose mom dragged him around the course while he cried! Hopefully the memory (or his crazy mom in general) won’t kill his enthusiasm!

Comment by dgobs

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